Do you know the difference between what you want and what you need this Christmas?

Almost 25 years ago, something I loved very much was already giving me hints to the challenge of explaining the difference between “I need” and “I want” to my children. As I spent this morning struggling to make them understand, we serendipitously ended up listing to R.E.M.’s outstanding I Believe from the underrated Life’s Rich Pageant album:

Explain the change, the difference between
What you want and what you need, there’s the key,
…
I believe my shirt is wearing thin
And change is what I believe in

Taken out of context like that both that Lyric and the ones in other songs on the album sound like a plea for sustainability well before it was trendy to do so.

Fall on Me, probably the first R.E.M. song I ever heard, and What if we give it away? from the same cut also contain gestures to the huge blurring of the lines between “need” and “want” in our modern society.

As we come up to the Consumerist Festival of Christmas, those reminders become more sobering. I urge you to join me in declining to buy unnecessary or extravagant gifts this year. And even if you do feel the need to gift, at least be more selective about what it is you are buying and ensure it is something which the recipient actually needs.

If we don’t change to practice the lack of a relationship between “I want” and “I need”, how do we expect our kids to learn it?